What’s This Here Sauce? – The Daily Cartoonist

Sweet dreams and flying machines in pieces on the ground, and I’m kind of surprised that anybody had time to respond, given that Dear Leader pulled the plug at two in the afternoon, so we’ll give some other cartoonists a chance to catch up.

And speaking of catch-up, we’re in good hands, because our Secretary of Education reports that schools are now teaching children about steak sauce.

It wasn’t that long ago that Godfrey Cambridge asked “What’s this here sauce?” and now it’s in the classrooms! What a world!

Okay, it’s more sad than funny that we can look back on the Covid years nostalgically, but then again, we could have looked back on them as a clue and we didn’t, or at least half of us didn’t, which is all it took. But enough politics, and that’s not the only thing that’s changed.

We keep finding new ways to make ourselves miserable. I remember going to a Lyme disease grand-rounds at a hospital back in my reporting days when it hadn’t quite reached as far north as I was living, but it arrived shortly thereafter.

Speaking of rounds reminds me that when I had my cancer surgery, I woke out of my drug-induced torpor to find that I was included in teaching rounds and a group of six or eight medical students were gathered around my bed.

Given the current demographics of med school, they were all 20-something women in white lab coats and for a minute I thought I’d been transferred to Castle Anthrax, but no such luck.

However, in retrospect, it occurs to me that we’ve seen several med students come and go at the dog park over the past several years and none of them have been guys. Any men who are shy about having women look at their bodies had better get over it, because we’re gonna run out of male doctors in a little while.

Though as Mike Baldwin suggests, perhaps it won’t matter. And he gets a Good Timing Award because this ran in the golden moment between the time Dear Leader announced a tariff on pharmaceuticals and the time he called it off, and it’s hard to hit a moving target.

At the other end of the timing factor is today’s Baby Blues, since we’re about two months away from the end of school here and I think in most places. Maybe Wanda has better eyesight that I have, because even as a kid I didn’t start seeing the end of the school year until at least the middle of May.

Though it’s pleasant to see kids in a comic strip excited about vacation, since that’s traditionally seen as only slightly more pleasant than a death sentence by most comic kids, for reasons I’ve never understood.

I think Eckstein must have once used Turbotax, because they are as persistent as an alumni association in finding you and asking for money. They’ve also about doubled their price since I used them, so I wasn’t planning to use them again, but hitting “unsubscribe” on their emails was pointless because they just kept coming.

I’m hoping it stops after April 15, but, after six tries, I’ve finally got them going into my spam file, which I would point out is not the same as being “unsubscribed.”

My spam file is a tribute to persistence. At least a decade ago, I looked up an article on either Ha’aretz or the Jerusalem Post and my spam file continues to fill with emails about Jewish singles sites and various kosher food sources.

I also regularly get job offers for another Peterson who seems to have typed my email address on her on-line resume, and I can’t unsubscribe to or killfile those because they come from a variety of dubious employment agencies. The latest one suggests I might be right for a job selling cars, or possibly as a scheduling coordinator or perhaps as a home health aide.

I’d love to see this woman’s resume, because there’s absolutely no pattern to the careers other people think she’d be perfect for, as long as they got part of her first few paychecks in return for the referral.

It’s comforting to know that this fellow also goes to lectures in the UK. I was afraid he was totally an American phenomenon.

The solution is to have people in the audience write their questions on cards, which allows the panel to choose the ones they want to address and limits the amount of argumentative logorrhea as well.

Juxtaposition of the Day

Sort of an asked-and-answered pairing here. I like Eddie’s question, because it’s the sort of thing a little kid might ponder for awhile before bringing it up for discussion.

I have no idea what things Paul Noth ponders, but I’m glad he gets some funny ones down on paper. This example takes the shine off the phrase “busy as a bee,” and they probably sit around on break talking about the good old days when they used to go out, gather pollen and dance.

But at least they get to work from home, which is something.

As for the chain of thought that got Dave Coverly to this spot, I don’t think I want to know, but he sure got a laugh from me. And the thing is, this wouldn’t be funny if it weren’t happening in a universe of dogs. If a human were scattering the ashes, it would just be appalling, but this is hilarious. Or possibly tasteless. Not that it can’t be both.

Example: When Woody Guthrie died, the family decided to scatter his ashes in the river, but, when they got there and unwrapped the package, they realized it was a sealed can and they didn’t have a can opener. But someone had a jack-knife, so they punched holes in it, only the ashes were too coarse to pour through, so they threw the whole can in the river.

And it floated, so they had to chuck rocks at it until, between tilting and being splashed, it took on enough water to sink.

That’s how I want to go.

Or maybe like this: