UPDATE: |Woman tells gaslighting ex who bombarded her with ‘chilling’ 250 WhatsApp messages in 24 hours: ‘I’ve lost nothing but a f*****g psycho in my life’ News

‘You bombarded her with insulting and abusive messages and persistent phone calls’

A woman put her gaslighting ex-partner in his place, telling him ‘I have lost nothing but a f*****g psycho in my life’, a court heard.

She stood up to David Matthias, 37, after he ended their relationship and falsely accused her of cheating on him in a torrent of voicemails. During a week of exchanges – including 250 messages spanning just 24 hours – Matthias initially called the woman a ‘s**g’, only to then ask her if she was ‘ok’.

But, the court heard, she responded: ”Obviously I am not alright. You are the one who literally broke up with me. I am not your issue any more. ‘I want you to leave me alone. You are not allowed to ask these questions now. You left the picture when you broke up with me. I did f*** all wrong. I do not deserve this.”

A judge said his behaviour was ‘nothing short of chilling’.

During the dramatic exchanges heard in court, Matthias, from Powells Orchard, Chester, persisted: “I do not understand it. I am only asking because I am worried about you. This is our relationship. You know how much I love you. In a week’s time we will realise what we have lost.”

But the woman, who is in her 20s and from Flintshire, retorted: “You are f*****g delusional. I have lost nothing but a f*****g psycho in my life. So leave me.” She subsequently called police when he repeatedly threatened to turn up at her home, the court heard.

Inquiries revealed Matthias had begun dating her just two months after he was convicted of stalking another ex-partner, Chester Crown Court was told. He admitted harassing the woman and was issued with a restraining order banning him from contacting her for ten years. The court heard the pair had been together for a month before they split in September 2023 after an argument.

Phil Clemo, prosecuting, said: ”He accused her of cheating, but she says she was simply talking to a male friend.

“He broke up with her by text message, but in the days that followed he sent her a large number of insulting and derogatory messages. He would call her things like ‘s**’ and other misogynistic names like that. She blocked him on WhatsApp but he moved to Facebook. She blocked him on that and then got an apology message from him on TikTok.

“She blocked him again and then blocked him on all social media platforms that she was on, but had to unblock him by text to arrange to get her possessions back. He told her they were outside in the rain. She went to collect them and he later sent her a message making it plain that he had watched her attend at his address – this greatly unnerved her.

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“She also received a number of missed calls from a withheld number. She suspected it was the defendant and this was confirmed when he left her a voicemail asking her to unblock him on WhatsApp. She describes his attempts at trying to call her that day as being constant.

“She told him that she would get in touch if she wanted to, but that he was to leave her alone. But the calls didn’t stop. She turned her phone off and went to work, but became aware of missed calls throughout the day.

“He said, perhaps rather chillingly, that she was making him lose respect towards women and asked if she was with another man. He also asked for forgiveness as well as making it clear that he knew she planned to go to Manchester that Friday. He also called her when she was out with a friend in Chester.

“He, presumably having heard noise in the background, assumed she was out and called again saying he was heading into town and wanted to see her. Disturbed by this she went home in her car, but he carried on trying to call and when he realised she was driving he said he would meet her at her house.

“She begged him not to, but he said they needed to sort the relationship out whilst she pointed out very clearly to him that there was no relationship. She couldn’t have made it any plainer.”

In a statement, the woman said she suffered bouts of depression due to previous relationship traumas and added: “When I told David things about my past, he would say his job was to protect me. But he in fact triggered my condition due to his gaslighting. I have not left the house in weeks as I do not want the opportunity to see him.

“I thought I had finally found the person who treated me right, but I feel like I cannot trust my own instincts. His actions have left me feeling completely helpless and I no longer see friends.”

She added she felt she was ‘constantly on high alert’. “I feel sick every time I see his model of car and I am constantly checking over my shoulder,” added her statement.

Matthias was also sentenced to an 18-month community order with the requirement he completes 150 hours of unpaid work and 20 days of rehabilitation activity. In mitigation, solicitor advocate Peter Barnett said: “The defendant accepts that he used inappropriate words and has a better insight now. He is struggling with his mental health.”

Sentencing Judge Natalie Cuddy told Matthias: ”You bombarded her with insulting and abusive messages and persistent phone calls. She blocked you on the phone and or social media platforms but your behaviour persisted. You appeared intent on trying to resolve matters and return her to the relationship when she was abundantly clear to you that is not what she wanted.

“It is right to say that your behaviour was nothing short of chilling. Your insistence that you would go to her house when she made it clear that she did not want you would no doubt have caused her considerable anxiety and worry.”